It’s an interesting fact that men and women are looked at differently in how they respond to divorce. Men, it’s assumed, are more about action and getting things done, while women are assumed to be caring or to be more feeling.
The reality is that men also have feelings, and they have their own thoughts about divorce. They may be afraid to share how they feel because they realize that there is almost a taboo with sharing feelings as a man in this society. It’s simply not a part of that gender role.
It’s important to understand the reason for the divorce
For attorneys, it is important to understand the reason for the divorce and the drive behind wanting to get it done. Some men may want to break from this topic and start discussing finances or other aspects of the divorce, but a good attorney will keep them on the topic, figure out how he feels about the divorce and about how his family has been affected. Questions like, “Who initiated the divorce?” or “Do you feel like you’re being heard?” are helpful in figuring out exactly where a man stands in the divorce process.
Men are stereotyped as being the breadwinners and being less feeling, but the truth is that even if they are the one bringing in a greater amount of income, they likely have strong feelings about the divorce, too. Men and women have been working toward equality and sharing family and work responsibilities, so it’s important that their legal support follows this line of thinking as well.
In American culture, it’s normal to see men and women split off into their more traditional roles, but that doesn’t mean that men should be the only ones focused on money or that women should be assumed to be better caretakers. This is a time to avoid stereotypes and to look at each person as an individual, parent and person who wants to move forward following the end of a marital relationship. Approaching divorce in a neutral way without these stereotypes may help men get more out of it and feel greater satisfaction with the results.