Marriage is a mutual agreement that requires the full commitment and effort of both parties for success. When one spouse checks out of the relationship or decides to cheat, both parties suffer. Divorce is sometimes the only possible solution when one spouse violates their vows.
Unfortunately, there are certain social stereotypes that don’t really reflect the reality of married relationships and modern divorce. For example, most people just assume that the husband is the one at fault when a couple divorces, even the women are more likely than men to initiate divorce proceedings in modern America.
Why do people put so much blame on male spouses in modern relationships?
People still assume that men are always the ones who cheat
Infidelity remains one of the leading causes of divorce filings. When one spouse discovers a sexual or emotional affair with another person, it may undermine their faith in their spouse or commitment to the relationship.
It is, unfortunately, true that most people assume that when a couple divorces because of infidelity, it is the man who probably cheated. However, women can easily choose to be unfaithful just like men can and may even have a greater risk of indulging in an emotional affair because of what they perceive as unmet needs.
Fairy tales and romance novels give women unrealistic expectations
Little girls are brought up on stories where some fabulous man fixes all of a woman’s problems. Those stories don’t become any less fantastic and exaggerated when they grow into women. Romance novels and popular “chick flicks” often show men with significant resources, perfect bodies and an infinite capacity to pay attention to their romantic partners.
Women may crave attention, gifts and affection beyond what their spouse can give. They may grow to resent what they perceive as the lack of excitement or romance in the relationship and file for divorce out of a sense of dissatisfaction or boredom. Although people often blame the men in such situations, it is the expectations of the women and not the behavior of the men that ultimately leads to marital dissolution.
Recognizing the cultural bias against men during divorce proceedings can help you better prepare to protect yourself if you are about to end your marriage.